How We Speak Reflects Our Hearts

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Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.

Psalm 19:14

It might be strange to say, but I believe that most of the regrets that remain fresh in my memory throughout my life are things that I said rather than things that I physically did. Though after hearing many people talk about the “foolish” things they’ve said, it seems that this is a common human problem. Not just weird or embarrassing things that we say, but unkind, selfish, ungrateful, and unthoughtful things that we say. Sometimes words will leave a deep cut in the person who hears (or may hear about it) that will never completely fade. Sometimes words can lead others into sin, celebrating what is evil and opposing what is good. Yes, we are also capable of saying words that are kind, positive, gracious, and good, but why do we speak in a hurtful or thoughtless way at all? It is because of the sin in our hearts that has made us broken people, broken thinkers, doers, and speakers. The words we speak do not determine who we are, but they are a powerful reflection of what we truly treasure.

What We Say Reflects Our Hearts

Our actions reveal our hearts, but so do our words. Scripture shows an interesting parallel between what we say and what we desire in our hearts. It shows this in salvation when it says, “If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved” (Romans 10:9). Notice that it does not simply say “confess and be saved” but “confess what you believe in your heart.” Our words are powerful and proclaim the state of our souls, the core of our identity. God’s Word not only points to speech as a reflection of the salvation of our hearts but the everyday state of our hearts “Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer” (Psalm 19:14). What our heart meditates on, what it dwells on, is connected to the words we produce, no matter how insignificant they seem to us. The Psalmist in this verse desires that what is on his heart is pleasing to God because it will shape his words.

What Do Your Words Say About Your Heart?

If you look at the everyday, seemingly significant and insignificant words that you say to others, how would you analyze your heart? Pastor and Theologian Jon Bloom explains how we can test our hearts by our words:

[The words you speak will] all depend on what’s filling your heart. Jesus said, “Out of the abundance of the heart [the] mouth speaks” (Luke 6:45). A critical heart produces a critical tongue. A self-righteous heart produces a judgmental tongue. A bitter heart produces an acerbic tongue. An ungrateful heart produces a grumbling tongue. But a loving heart produces a gracious tongue. A faithful heart produces a truthful tongue. A peaceful heart produces a reconciling tongue. A trusting heart produces an encouraging tongue.¹

The sin that is harbored in our hearts produces sinful and harmful speech, likewise the goodness that is treasured in our hearts produces righteous speech. Sometimes we find ourselves talking more about ourselves than asking others about their lives, gossiping rather than encouraging, grumbling rather than thankfulness. Sometimes we amuse ourselves by spreading the flaws of others rather than speaking love and encouragement about them. Sometimes we feel that our words do not show the whole truth because we do not want to expose ourselves for who we really are. I know that for me, I have always struggled to speak about my faith when face-to-face with people who do not know Christ. They will ask me about my life, and I won’t mention God even once, even though He is the center of my life, even on the days that the Spirit helps me to think of Him all the day long. It has convicted me that my heart is filled with pride and often favors the glory of man rather than the glory of God because I am worried about what people will think of me. What do your words tell others, or even yourself, about your own heart?

How Can Our Words Reflect Goodness?

No one speaks perfectly because no one has a perfect heart (Romans 3:23). To speak goodness and truth into the world, it must come from our hearts, which means that a change of heart is needed to root out the sin that corrupts our speech and actions. The only way to change the heart completely and for eternity is to trust Christ as our only salvation, and He “will give you a new heart, and a new spirit [He] will put within you. And [He] will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh” (Ezekial 36:26). With completely new and softened hearts, we are able to love and desire the one true God. To speak with goodness and righteousness, we must desire Him, who is our perfect example of goodness and righteousness. We must pray to God and ask Him to help us grow more in our love for Him, for the greatest command humanity has ever received is “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind” (Matthew 22:37). If our hearts love Him greatly, our words will reflect great love for Him, and His great love toward others. His example is set for us in the Scripture, His intercession and help is available to us in prayer.

So how do we speak words that reflect a heart of goodness and righteousness? Look to the One who has never sinned, who has never gossiped, slandered others, grumbled, or blasphemed God, who has only spoken words of compassion, praise, truth, kindness, holiness, and beauty. His speech is of a completely righteous, just, merciful, and loving heart, and He graciously helps His children when they call to Him.

References

1. Bloom, Jon. “Fill Your Mouth with Life, Not Death.” Desiring God, 2 Sept. 2011, https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/fill-your-mouth-with-life-not-death